Breaking Doesn’t Have to be Hard to Do

Breaking up is known to have a reputation as being the hardest thing to do.  No matter how messed up and unhealthy the relationship was, it’s still hard.  People search for ways to get over a breakup almost as much as they search for the fountain of youth.  The bad news is that there is no one fountain of youth, only a lot of little springs of more youthful.  The good news is that there are definitely ways to feel better after a break up.  The only catch is that you have to be willing to dedicate yourself to doing the things that make you feel better.

Understanding why breaking up, with someone who did not make you happy, feels so bad, instead of like a huge relief, is easy once you stop romanticizing what you had and look at it for what it really was; miserable.  In fact once you understand what’s really making you feel bad about breaking up, doing the things that speed your recovery are much easier to do.

Being left is, not only a slap in the face, by the cold hard hand of rejection; it is also a scary loss of control over an important of aspect of your life, your love life, that is.  When a person decides that they are done with the relationship, and you, there is nothing you can say or do about it.  The irony of it all is that this is one of those situations that will inspire you with lots of things to say and do to stop the person from going through with the breakup.  Most of the time trying to keep the relationship going when the other person is determined to end it, will be an exercise in futility, and this will make the blow even more painful.  If we allow it to, the pain will take on a life of its own and leave us feeling like we have lost control over everything in our life; this is how the downward spiral begins.

Luckily the sinking feeling of uncertainty and fear can be made to feel smaller than you did at the moment you were told you are history.  All it takes to put things in their proper place is a little perspective.
One of the most helpful things you have to keep reminding yourself of is that your life didn’t end; only your relationship did.  It is also very helpful to keep guiding your thoughts away from what could have, maybe been, to what actually was.  You need to face the fact that you were probably as unhappy, maybe even more so, than your partner was, and they did you a great big favor by putting an end to both of your unhappiness.  You need to be realistic and admit to yourself that you miss having an intimate relationship, but not much more of what else you had towards the end.  If you are completely honest you will realize that if you had the chance, right now, to meet someone who you have incredible chemistry with, you would probably, so take that chance.
Once you get used to the idea of being single, you will realize that what you really are now, is available; available to meet someone who you can be completely happy with.

Getting A Prom Date, and How to Ask

eGirlHelp reader Ted asked the following:

So, I asked a girl if she was interested in going to prom with me (nothing else implied, it really is just going to the prom because otherwise neither of us would go) and she said “I’ll consider it”.
1: What does that mean?
2: What do I do now?

Do I call, wait a week, or what (we’re on spring break, so I won’t see her for a week or so).
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Girls Using ‘A Boyfriend’ As An Excuse

eGirlHelp reader Steve has asked the following question:

A common “turn down” girls use is “I have a boyfriend.” How can you tell when it’s true and when it’s just their way of turning you down? What’s the best way to respond to this, and is there any way to safely give them your number in case something happens with the current boyfriend?
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5 Ways to Look Good When Meeting A Girl

As a follow up to making a proper first impression, I’d like to highlight the importance of appearance. If you are looking for a cute girl, doesn’t it only make sense that she’s looking for a cute guy? You only get what you give, and chances are if you look bad, you’ll only be getting girls that look bad.

Therefore, in an effort to help you get a cute girl, I present 7 ways of looking good when meeting a girl.
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